Sinking Ship
by OneDirectionInfection89
Summary: Post Break-Up/ Pre Thanksgiving. Blaine is caught up over the break up. It is all his fault and Kurt won't even listen to him. Kurt is the only person that has ever listened to him and he can't go on without his anchor. *Self Harm* Spoilers for break-up and on. THANKSGIVING AND UP NEVER HAPPENED
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer; I do not own glee I would not come up with a great idea like that **

**Summary: Post Break-Up/ Pre Thanksgiving. Blaine is caught up over the break up. It is all his fault and Kurt won't even listen to him. Kurt is the only person that has ever listened to him and he can't go on without his anchor. *Self Harm* Spoilers for break-up and on. THANKSGIVING AND UP NEVER HAPPENED**

**Trigger warning; Suicide and self harm. **

**Prologue**

You thought that you could do anything. You felt that you were on cloud nine. All because one person can change your entire life and make your life change from hell to heaven in one minute. All because one person gave you that attention that you were so desperately begging for without even knowing it.

You didn't know that if he didn't come into your life, you would have cracked. Your mask would have broken and you would be nothing. Once he got there, you didn't need the mask. The mask you have been wearing ever since your old school broke your trust completely and make you trust no one.

You could relate to him. You have never met somebody you could relate to before. He changed your life, and you didn't even know. You didn't realize that you needed him so much, which is why you transferred schools to be with him. You didn't realize that you needed him so much, which is why you took the slushy for him.

You needed him so much. He was your anchor. You will always need him.

He left you all alone. He knew that he was the only one you trusted with all of your heart. He left you all by yourself, slowly going crazy with the loneliness on your shoulders. He promised he would call you, and he kept that promise at first. But then he got the fancy job, met fancy people, and he didn't need you anymore. He met many people he related to. Nobody judged him there, so he didn't need you.

He forgot about you. He forgot that you were still in Lima, that people still judged you everyday. He forgot that you needed him. He forgot that nobody cares what you do. That nobody cares about you.

You were slowly sinking. You didn't know what you were doing. You woke up, ate, went to school, went home, and slept. You fell into a continuous routine. You were slowly going crazy. People still bullied you. Without any glee clubbers there for him, it was worse than ever. You ignored everybody. Refused all solos in glee club. Only spoke to tell people you are fine. They wouldn't care even if you were not.

Then Eli came. Eli complimented you. Eli knew exactly what to say to make you feel better than you have since he left. Eli told you to go over.

You made the biggest mistake of your life. You couldn't deal with yourself. You were a monster. So you told him. You went to New York, and told him. He hated you. He ignored you. _He hated you_. So you started to hate yourself.

You believed you didn't need to live, that you had to torture yourself. You didn't need food, or sleep. You never smiled. You didn't need anything. All you needed was him. And he wasn't there. _He hated you_

Your grades fell massively. It didn't matter, however. Nothing mattered anymore. _He hated you. _You didn't want to do the school play. You couldn't. You did, however, as the teen angel. You didn't like it. You spent all your time backstage, only going on to practice your one scene. Then you went home and cried.

Eventually you stopped crying. You ran out of tears. You lost the light in your eyes when you lost him. _He hated you_.

You saw him in the audience. You could see all over his face that _he hates you._ You can't keep your eyes off him.

He saw you after the show. He didn't want to listen. He didn't trust you, is what he said. You could tell all it meant was _He hated you. _

You stopped calling him to apologize. You didn't have the energy to. You skipped school many times. You stopped floating from your anchor. You started sinking.

You don't know exactly when or why you came to the conclusion you shouldn't be here. You just know that you made up your mind.

You called him one last time to apologize for everything. You just can't take it anymore. You are weak. You need him but he isn't there. He will never be there. _He hated you._

You finish it, get it over with, because nobody will find you for at least a week. As you sink deeper and deeper, all you can hear is a faint buzzing. You aren't sure what it is, but look up to see your phone lighting up. It blurrily reads his name. You mutter what you are positive will be your last words.

"Im sorry Kurt"

**So. This is sad. It will be a chaptered story, starting from after Blaine reveals he cheated. So it will go back in time to when he was sad, but want yet depressed. **

**Review all you lovelies ;) **


	2. Drowning

**Disclaimer: I do not own glee. I wish I did **

**Summary: Post Break-Up/ Pre Thanksgiving. Blaine is caught up over the break up. It is all his fault and Kurt won't even listen to him. Kurt is the only person that has ever listened to him and he can't go on without his anchor. *Self Harm* Spoilers for break-up and on. THANKSGIVING AND UP NEVER HAPPENED **

**PRETEND BLAINE WAS IN THE SUPER HERO "Nightbird" ALL YEAR! NOT JUST IN DYNAMIC DUETS**

"_I was by myself. I needed you. I needed you around and you weren't there. I was lonely and I'm really sorry."_

"_And you don't think that I've been lonely! You don't think that I've had temptations! But I didn't act on it because I knew what it meant!_

Blaine woke up with a start. He didn't know what to do. It was 4:30 in the morning. He knew he couldn't sleep anymore. Instead, he went down into his basement, where his dad put in punching bags a few years back. He put on the gloves and started punching.

Bad Idea.

All he can think about is Kurt. How Blaine screwed up so much that Kurt won't even talk to him. He still loves him. Kurt hates him. Blaine doesn't blame Kurt, he did something horrible. Kurt has the right to hate Blaine.

Blaine stopped punching after about 20 minutes. He felt drained physically and emotionally. He decides to take a long shower to wash off. As soon as he gets into the shower, thoughts come rushing back to him. "_And you don't think that I've been lonely!" _Kurt had yelled. Blaine knows that Kurt has. But at least Kurt had Rachel. Blaine had nobody. Not a single person would care about him like Kurt did. Not even close.

The tears come rushing to Blaine, and he doesn't try to stop them. He huddles in the shower, sobbing uncontrollable. Once he calmed down a bit, he continued to wash his body. He went to shave his arms, but he went to fast, and the blade sliced his skin. Blaine winced. During the shower, he concentrated on the pain in his arm, instead of the pain in his heart.

Once he has ready to leave school, it was 7:58am, so Blaine got ready to go to school, as McKinley was an hour away from his house.

When Blaine got to school, he noticed that the jocks that tortured him everyday were in the same place as last time. He tried to walk in without the jocks noticing him, but they wouldn't have that.

"Hey Homo!" One of them yells. Blaine keeps walking.

"Hey Fag! Where are you going?" They all yell at him.

Suddenly, Blaine get slammed into a locker and he can't move. "I was talking to you, faggot." The jock says. "Why did you ignore me?" He shoves Blaine even harder into the locker.

"Hey!" He look to the right and see running up to him. "Hey, get off of him!" he says, and the jocks run away, releasing Blaine, and he falls to the floor. "Are you okay, Blaine?" asks. He nod and immediately put his mask on.

"Ya, im okay. Thanks" he says, quickly getting up walking down the hall. _Don't cry, Don't cry_ He reminds himself. _You deserve this. _Blaine gets into his class and sits down. His emotions are wild so he jams his hand where his cut was, focusing on that pain instead. He soon collects himself.

Sam walks into the room and sits next to Blaine. "Hey dude, you okay?" he asks. "You don't look so good."

"Ya, im fine, thanks" he tells Sam. Sam nods at him.

Soon, the day is over and Blaine walks to Glee. He is one of the first in the room, so he walks up and sits in the very back, as usual. Nobody bothers him leaves him to his thoughts. Blaine thinks of all the bad memories in this room.

"_Dude, I know you were a big deal at Dalton, or whatever, but we don't wear blazers here, so… have a seat" _

"_What the hell does that mean?" "It means, that I'm not for sale! Forget It!"_

"_I just want Blaine to know, that were not the Warblers. You know were not into the bells and whistles, or the ball hogging" "Im sorry, did I do something wrong?" _

"_Didn't you just say something about us not turning on each other?"_

All those things, Kurt was always there to bring him through. Help him. Kurt is not here anymore. Blaine does not know what to do.

"…Blaine?" He hears, and looks up at .

"Yes?"

"Do you have any idea what we should do for sectionals?" he asks.

"Umm, No" Blaine says, unsure. He really doesn't care.

Just then the bell rings, indicating it is time to leave. Blaine quickly gets up and leaves the class.

At home, Blaine sits on the kitchen floor, sobbing because he can, because he is realizing that it is his entire fault, that it is reality, that he is fully to blame. His parents are out on a business trip. They won't be back for a few months. He is alone.

Blaine glances down at the mark on his wrist, remembering the distraction it gave him, so he gets up and stumbles to the bathroom. He takes the same razor blade as last time and stares at his wrist. Blaine's tears have turned into a downpour, streaming down his cheeks.

Blaine picks up the razor. Without even thinking, he cuts the skin, and sobs out loud. He runs the razor over more parts of the skin a few more times before dropping the razor and curling into a ball on the bathroom floor.

"Im sorry Kurt" Blaine sobs, every inch of him despising himself. "I'm so sorry"

That night, Blaine lies on his bed, wide awake, thinking about Kurt.

_He has the right to hate you, _a voice says in Blaine's head. _You are worthless; nobody wants you in this world. Your parents leave months on end to get away from you, your brother stays in L.A to get away from you, the New Directions only let you stay because they need enough people. Kurt was the only one who cared, and you ruined that too. You don't deserve to be here. _

Blaine nods in agreement with the voice. He doesn't have any reason to be here. He had tried calling Kurt right after he got out of the bathroom, but he didn't answer. _See? Kurt hates you_. That thought made Blaine choke a sob. The only person in the world that Blaine thought would always be there for him hates him because Blaine was stupid. _I have always been an idiot. _Blaine thinks. _I'm done. Stop thinking of yourself and do anything people ask. Do what you did when you first got to Dalton. You don't need anybody _Blaine reminds himself.

"I don't need anybody" Blaine mumbles. "Not anymore"

If only he knew how untrue that was.

**K/B SS K/B SS**

When Blaine got to school the next day, he walked straight into Sam. "Sorry!" Blaine said quickly.

"It's ok, dude" Sam said, balancing Blaine by putting his hand on Blaine's arm. Blaine stiffened and jerked his hand back. "Dude, are you okay?" Sam asks, face showing concern.

"Ya, im fine." Blaine said. He was getting tired of people asking him that. Before Sam could reply Blaine ran off down the hall to his first class. He ignored all the teachers in all the classes, never talked, barley paid attention, acted like he wasn't even there.

This went on for weeks. He would wake up, and each and everyday he would sink deeper and deeper into nothingness. Blaine would feel nothing. He said nothing to anybody, unless directly spoken to.

After a few weeks, Sam confronted Blaine. "Dude, you are not okay. You look like you haven't slept in weeks" he accused. He wasn't wrong. Blaine sat up at night, wondering what would happen to him if he disappeared.

Would anybody notice? How long would it take to someone to realize he was gone? If they did find him, would anybody care? Probably not. His parents would probably be happy they don't have to keep leaving. The glee club would be happy they don't have to watch him mope anymore. Kurt would be glad, because then Blaine would stop calling him. Blaine still called Kurt everyday to apologize. He doubts Kurt even listens to the voicemails anymore.

"Blaine?" Sam's voice drifts into Blaine's mind.

"Hm?" Blaine asks, looking at Sam.

"Dude you have not been yourself since you and Kurt broke up." Sam accuses.

"I know. Im sorry, im just trying to forget" Blaine lies. _That's all you are_ Blaine reminds himself, _a liar. _

"Well stop it, 'cause your making everybody sad." Sam says.

Blaine sighs. "Ya I know, Im sorry." He says.

Sam and him walk over to the play sign up sheet. Blaine tells him he doesn't want to sign up, tells him that he hasn't slept, and barley eaten. Sam talks about the break up a bit, but Blaine refuses to tell him the whole story. About how he cuts himself to lessen the mental pain. He just can't tell people he barley trusts those things. Blaine trusts Sam; he is the closest thing Blaine has to a friend. He just isn't ready to trust Sam whole-heartily.

It turns out Blaine does try out for the school play. They offer him the role of Danny. As they offer the role, Blaine just can't take it anymore. He can feel the tears coming, so he declines the offer of Danny and runs off the stage.

Blaine starts the car and goes home. He barley realizes he is home, that he traveled up the stairs and wandered to the bathroom. He picked up the razor, and cut his wrist.

"Kurt hates you" Blaine murmurs. Cut. "You worthless piece of shit" Cut. "You are the reason Kurt hates you" Cut. Sob. "K-Kurt will never for-forgive y-you" Cut. Sob. Cut. Sob.

Blaine lies there for the longest time sobbing. He feels nothing. It's as if the blood was all the pain that Blaine has in his heart. He is numb. "You deserve this" Blaine whispers as he slowly drifts off, lying on the tiles of the cold floor.

Blaine couldn't tell what happened during the rehearsals of the play. He was so numb that he would sit backstage, totally silent, go on stage, practice his one scene as Teen Angel, then go backstage and sit there silent once more.

**B/K SS B/K SS**

It was the day of the play. Blaine is getting into his Teen Angel costume, thinking over and over _one scene, its one scene. _He goes backstage for a team meeting before they go on, and all the emotions, all the pain come sweeping back into Blaine. Because there is Kurt, looking as perfect as Blaine remembers him. Kurt is staring right at him. All Blaine can see in Kurt's eyes is hate. Pure hate for hurting that amazing heart. Finn comes over and talks to Rachel. Blaine soon has to go prepare for the play. He is terrified because the pain hit him full force, and he is on the verge of tears. A few deep breaths and he is okay.

Blaine is okay until halfway through his scene. He sees Kurt in the audience, staring at him with hate all in his eyes. Blaine cannot keep his eyes away from him. He tries to look away, but his eyes just keep going right back to Kurt. _Kurt hates you_ He stumbles in his song, but he continues to pretend he is fine. Just like before.

After the performance, they talk. Kurt says he doesn't trust Blaine anymore. Blaine can easily translate that sentence into 'I don't love you anymore. I hate you' and as soon as Kurt is out of sight, Blaine sinks to the floor and sobs. He has all of the pain in him, it is overwhelming. He needs a release of the pain. He can't go back home yet, he reminds himself. Instead he hurries backstage, gets the knife they use to cut fabric for the costumes, and walks into the bathroom. Goes into the bathroom. Lifts up the sleeve of the costume and cuts. The pain washes away with the blood in the sink. Some of the pain. Blaine doesn't think he will ever be able to not feel the pain. He screwed up big time.

He did not pay attention at the meeting after the play. All he could think of was how Kurt hates him.

After the meeting, Blaine went home. He didn't talk to anybody. He got in his car, drove the hour to get to his house, sat in the main hallway, and cried all night. He didn't move. The just cried over the fact he will never have the good life he used to, and there is nobody else to blame but himself.

He didn't go to school the next day. Or the day after. He just didn't have the energy to get up. The first few days he moved from the hallway to the kitchen to get an apple and a knife. He cut up the apple, ate it, but did not release the knife. He stared at it, contemplating whether or not it was worth it. _Nobody would care _he reminded himself, _but I want one more day. To talk to people, act like nothing is wrong for one more day._ And that was his plan.

**B/K SS B/K SS**

On his way to school the next morning, he put on the radio for the first time in weeks. The song on the radio almost made Blaine cry.

_Made a wrong turn  
Once or twice  
Dug my way out  
Blood and fire  
Bad decisions  
That's alright  
Welcome to my silly life  
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood  
Miss, no way it's all good  
It didn't slow me down  
Mistaken  
Always second guessing  
Underestimated  
Look, I'm still around…_

Blaine smashed the off button on the radio. Of course, his and Kurt's song came on. It is as if the world knows it is the last day of his life, and is giving him closure. Blaine remembers the last time he thought it was going to be the last day of his life…

**The bell rings, and Blaine gets up from his spot in the English class at Dalton Academy, completely silent. He knows it will be his last time Im this room, so he slowly packs up his things, looking around the room. **

"**Mr. Anderson? Are you alright?" his teacher asks him. All the teachers know about his depression, and the bullying at his old school. **

"**Yes. I'm great, thank you" Blaine responds apathetically. He then gets up and goes to his last ever Warblers performance, his last time doing the only thing the loves. Singing. **

**As he walks down the staircase, somebody taps on his shoulder. "Um, excuse me? Could you tell me what is going on here? Im new" Blaine sees the most beautiful person he has ever seen standing on the stair above him, staring at him. **

"**Im Blaine" he extends his hand and the mystery boy shakes it. **

"**Kurt" **

**That is when Blaine started to re-think his decision. Maybe he shouldn't take his life away **

Kurt stopped him from taking his life away without even knowing it. Kurt doesn't know Blaine has always had suicidal thoughts. Kurt knew Blaine has a very low self-esteem, and thinks low of himself, but Blaine never told him he wanted to commit suicide. He never wanted to with Kurt around.

When Blaine gets to school, he sees Marley. _First Goodbye_ Blaine thinks a he walks over to her. "Hey, Marley. Do you have a second?' He asks.

"Oh, Hi Blaine! Of course I have a second" Marley says "Are you okay? You haven't been here the last few days. You look terrible" she says, looking concerned.

"Oh, Ya, im fine." He pretends to smile. "I just never got a chance to say you were amazing in the play" he says.

"Thanks, Blaine! You were too!" he smiles happily.

"One scene isn't that good. But thank you" he says. "Look, I just wanted to tell you that you are beautiful, you know that? Don't let anybody change that" he says, remembering her freak out about her costume before the play.

"Thank you, Blaine" Marley says. "You are very nice" she says.

_No im not, im a monster_ Blaine thinks. "Thanks, Marley" he says and hugs her "you're a great friend" he says then walks off to class. _One goodbye down_. He walks into class and sits beside Artie. "Hey, Artie" he says.

"Hey Blaine! What's up?" he says "Why haven't you been here for awhile?"

"I was sick" he replies. "But I have to tell you something. You were a great director. You are amazing at it. West side story, the Christmas special, Grease. I think you have something really special going on for you." He says

"Thanks Blaine!" Artie smiles. "That means a lot; it is a lot of work"

"No problem, just remember I will always believe in you" Blaine says.

"Huh? Are you okay Blaine?" he asks worried.

"Ya! Im fine" Blaine's voice cracks a bit. Before Artie can reply, he walk over to Tina across the room. "Hey"

"Hi Blaine" Tina says, a bit distractedly, reading a book.

"Can I talk to you for a sec?" he asks.

Tina sighs a bit dramatically "Ya" she says, looking up.

"I know that people don't treat you like they should. You are an amazing singer, and you will go far. I just want you to know that whatever happens, I think you will be amazing at it." He explains.

Tina looks up with tears in her eyes. "Thanks Blaine" she says. "I think you are an amazing singer too. You're amazing" she said, getting up and hugging him.

_If only I believed that_ he thought, but smiled none the less. "Thank You" he whispered.

At lunch, he sat beside Brittany. "Hey Britt." He says.

She looks up "Dolphin!" she says, throwing her arms around him. "I didn't know where you were! Are you sick?" she asks, putting her hand on his forehead.

"No, im okay, thanks Britt. I need to talk to you" he says. "Its important."

"Okay." Brittany says, sitting down beside him.

"You are an incredible person, Britt. I have never met anybody like you." He starts, but she cuts him off.

"Thank you, Blaine Warbler! I have never met a dolphin like you before!" she said. "Kurt is like a unicorn dolphin, and you are a Nightbird dolphin. Like your superhero, remember?" she asks, smiling dreamily.

"Yes, I remember. But listen, Britt." He takes her hand. "I love you. You are so amazing, and you never let anybody forget you rock" he says, tears shining in his eyes. "I will miss you" he says.

"Where are you going?" She asks. "When will you be back?"

"I am going somewhere nobody knows, Britt. You cant tell anybody, okay?" he says

"Why not?" she asks confused.

"It's a surprise. When I get there, everybody will be so happy. They will be glad I am there" he says with a tear escaping his eye.

"If you are gone, I won't be happy." Brittany says.

"You will see me again, Britt. I just want you to know I love you, okay?" he asks. Brittany nods. "But you can't tell anybody." He says to her. "Promise?"

"I promise" she says. "I love you too, Blaine Warbler. I don't want you sad. Will you be happy there dolphin?" she says, about to cry.

"I hope so, Britt. But I will be happier than I am here." He says, pulling her into a hug.

"I will miss you and your raspberry hair gel" she sniffles.

'I will miss you and your amazing logic" he says. She kisses him on the cheek.

"You are the only person that has never called me stupid, you know that?" she says. "I don't like being called stupid"

'I think you are one the smartest people I know, Britt." He says "Never forget that, especially when im gone"

"Ok" she whispers.

_Two more goodbyes at McKinley. _

"Finn? Can I talk to you?" Blaine asks.

"Ya, sure Blaine." Finn says, looking at Blaine. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to say that as much as people think you are dumb, or anything, I think you are smart, and you can do anything. You did a really good job on the play" he said.

"Thanks. I think." Finn says. "Are you okay?" he asks. Blaine is really tired of that question.

"Ya, I'm fine. I just wanted to tell you to keep moving, live your dreams, and do anything." Blaine sighs. "I know I will never be your favorite person in the world, with what happened last year, and with Ku-Kurt" Blaine chokes. "But I just wanted to say I have always looked up to you." He says

"Um, thanks Blaine. Ya, I really appreciate that." Finn said, smiling.

"Oh, and I have to skip Glee today, have to go out with my parents. Tell all the members I love them, okay?" he says

"Uh, sure" Finn says. Blaine says his goodbyes and walk away.

_One more goodbye here. Three more outside of here._

"Sam? Can I walk to you before class starts?" Blaine asks.

"Sure, dude. What's up?" Sam says. Blaine leads him outside.

"I just wanted to thank you for being there for me" Blaine explains. "With the break-up and everything, you have been there to help me"

"No prob, dude, I just wanted you to be a bit more happy." Sam explained. _He wanted you to be happy so you won't bother him with your moping._

"Thanks for that. Look at us, Nightbird and Blonde Chameleon." Blaine says.

"Don't forget Cyclops and Wolverine" Sam reminds him.

"Of course" Blaine says. He sighs. "Just tell me, if I am ever gone, just remember those names? Don't forget me." he says.

"What do you mean? Like sick like you were after the play?" Sam asks.

"Yeah. Like that" Blaine said. "I have to go out with my parents tonight, not gunna make glee, so give the guys my best, okay?" He says.

"Sure dude" Sam says, fist bumping Blaine.

_This is it. _Blaine thinks looking up at the school. _Goodbye McKinley. _

Blaine gets in his car and leaves, for good, not looking back. 

**B/K SS B/K SS**

Blaine pulls into Hummel Tire and Lube, preparing if he gets hit. He would deserve it.

With a big sigh, Blaine walks into the shop. He looks around for Burt, finding the bald man fixing a car. He walks over to him, all his muscles tense. "Mr. Hummel?" he asks. Burt looks up, laughing quietly.

"Hey Kid. Did you come here for a reason? I am not fixing your car, you hurt my son." He said.

"My car is fine, Mr. Hummel. I just needed to tell you something" Blaine explained. "You can hit me all you like, but let me explain something first"

"Now why would I hit you? Ya, im pissed at you for hurting Kurt, and I would like to whack you silly, but I won't." Burt explained. "Now what do you want, Blaine?"

"I just want to say thank you. My dad stopped being a dad to be as soon as I came out. He hates me, we all know it. As soon as I met you, I saw you as the father figure in my life. Once I started dating K-Kurt, you treated me like your own son. I really appreciate that." Blaine said. Burt just stared at him, so he kept going.

"My entire life, my dad has been a little too busy for me. They already had one kid who was nine when I was born; almost fully raised in their opinion, so why have to do it all over again? I was never good enough for my dad. If I did anything right, he would just compare it to Cooper and how he could have done it better. When I met you, you never compared me to other people, just myself, and you care for your son so much. I love that, because I never got that. I just want to thank you for being there for me these last few years. And really thank you for being there for Kurt. I love him so much, and I would not want him to be treated by you like my dad." Blaine says, close to tears

"Tell me Blaine, if you love Kurt so much, why cheat on him?" Burt asks suspiciously.

"I don't know" Blaine whispers. "I just thought that Kurt was in New York, meeting a cute gay guy everyday, forgetting about me because I was just a guy in boring old Lima Ohio. I thought he was forgetting me."

"You're an idiot if you think Kurt would forget you." Burt says

"I know" he whisper. "He just didn't talk to me, answer phone calls, and I just thought the worst." Blaine says. "But I just came here to say thank you for all that, I'll be out of your way for good now"

"You sound as if you are never going to see me again" Burt says.

"Well, I won't. I guess I could see you out occasionally, but I doubt it." Blaine explains. "I live in Westerville."

Burt is looking at Blaine as if he knows what Blaine is planning on doing. Blaine hurriedly says goodbye, and walks out the door, smashing into someone. "Im sor"-

Way to end your life.

Running into the bullies that ruined your life.

"Hey! Guys its that fag Blaine! Hey Buddy! I missed you! I bet you missed us!" They say.

"I have to go" Blaine says, pushing past them.

"C'mon Blaine, we need to make up for lost time!" one says. Blaine just keeps going.

"Hey Queer! Just do yourself a favor and kill yourself, it will make everybody happier!" they taunt

"Just one quick jump and you would make everybody happier!" They scream.

Blaine gets in his car as fast as he can and rushes away, tears starting to stream down his face. He gets home and collapses. He still needs to say goodbye to two more people.

He can barley speak, he is sobbing so loud, so he sends Cooper a text message.

_Coop,_

_You were never the best brother ever. You told me what I did wrong, never what I did right. But you were there for me. I appreciate that. But now you are out there, living your dream, and I am in your way. I love you, big brother. I just can't do this anymore_

_I know you probably wont even read this boring message from your annoying baby brother for at least a week, but this is all I am saying. _

_Don't miss me_

_Don't pity me_

_Just remember me as who I was. I sad little boy who's parents didn't like him, and who only ruined things. _

_You were the best brother you could be, and I am glad you were there, at least for a little while. _

_Love, _

_Your baby brother Blaine_

Blaine can barley breath by the time he hits send.

"One more goodbye" he mumbles. "Most important"

He dials the number. It goes straight to voicemail.

_Hello! You have reached Kurt Hummel, employee at , I can't come to the phone right now, so please leave a message and I will get back to you. _

BEEP

"H-Hi Ku-Kurt. I-I love you so-so-so much and I-I just can't even say how mu-much I am sorry! I know you ha-hate me, and I can't deal with that" Blaine Sobs into the phone. "I know you won't even listen to this, 'cause you hate me, but I have to say it. You are the only person I have ever loved! My parents hate me; McKinley only liked me because I was with you! If you hate me, I have nobody. We were born to love, right? I can't love if nobody loves me! I try to be so ni-nice to people, and all they care about is themselves! Or how much I am a queer! Did you know I ran into my bullies today? From my old school? It was great" he laughs humorless, filled with spit, "They told me I should just kill myself! What a great idea!" he said, laughing loudly again, sobbing as well.

"Did you know we have a superhero club at school? Ya, I used to run it, until now, I guess, but I called myself Nightbird, avenger of darkness. It's funny, cause all I seem to do is hurt people!" he is gasping "I am I villain! Not a Hero!" he screams as loud as he can. "Kurt- Kurt- Kurtie I love you so much, you saved me from myself, you really did." He gasped another breath "I wanted to end it the day I met you, but I didn't, because you were there, so strong, and I loved that! You kept me strong!" Blaine kept screaming. "You know I hate myself, and always will! Without you, there id nobody to remind me that someone loves me! I know you hate me, I hate me too! But nobody loves me. You know how I said I was a villain? I don't want to be a villain! I want to be a hero!"

"Sometimes heroes have to make sacrifices. The only way to get rid of the villain inside me is to kill it" he whispers "I will do that! But if the villain is dead, the hero will die too, Kurt! I am willing to kill the villain! Everybody will be happier if I die! You can stop getting my god-awful messages!" Blaine sobs when his phone beeps, signaling that the message has stopped, that it was too long.

Blaine screams bloody murder, sobbing into his pillow for a very long time. His phone keeps buzzing, but he doesn't answer it. He doesn't care about it. Instead, he goes into the bathroom. He grabs the Razor, and without thinking, he cuts his entire arm once, twice, ten times, until he falls over. He is lying in a pile of his own blood, enjoying the warm feeling that it gives him.

Just as Blaine is losing himself, going into the sweet oblivion that is death, he hears a faint cry. Someone is shaking him, yelling at him to wake up, to stay with them, but Blaine won't listen. He wants to die. He has been waiting for this moment for a long time. He builds up the strength to mutter three faint words.

"Kurt, im sorry"

And then he is gone.

**So I need help? Should Blaine Die? Should he live? **

**Review to let me know what should happen! **


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